TJ's New Product Roundup

The past few months we've road-tested a few new products (or new to us) from Trader Joe's. A quick review:

* White bean hummus: It's a nice break from regular hummus, which is always in the Bistro fridge. But it comes topped with a cloying layer of olive oil and sun--dried tomatoes that's hard to avoid. Grade: C+

* Cherry-granola cookies: I used to be indifferent about dessert. Sure, a bite of ice cream or a biscotto would be nice, I would say, but do I need it? Nah. Until now. The cherry-granola cookies are crunchy and moist at the same time, an addictive balance of rich molasses and tart cherry chunks. Grade: A

* No-boil lasagna noodles: Finally. TJ's always carried other fresh pasta options, why not lasagna? Grade: B

* Fage Greek-style yogurt: Thick and creamy, just like I remember eating at a beachfront cafe on Santorini after sleeping all night on the beach. (Those were the days.) One slight difference: the lady of the Bistro demands no-fat, so we get the no-fat. Not nearly as rich, but the texture is about the same. Grade: B+

Yuck?

Welcome to the Bistro's new irregularly scheduled feature, "Yuck?", in which we combine two tastes that don't normally go great together. The idea comes from my previous post about subbing hummus for butter. It works for lox and tomatoes, but will it spread nicely with sweets? On the face of it, why not? Peanut butter is a salty goo; butter can be salty too.

Feel free to add to the Yuck? ouevre. If you test something out, post it with a Yuck? heading so we know what's coming. We're not turning mayonnaise into foam or weaving pea-shoot nests for our foie gras dumplings, so it's the least we can do to contribute to the literature of culinary experiment. Ready? Here goes.

Hummus + Blueberry jam on toast

The verdict: Tastes surprisingly bland. Instead of the salty and sweet playing off each other as they do when, say, meat and fruit are paired, they seem to cancel, leaving the main sensation one of texture, not taste. And unfortunately, it's not a winning texture. The reason peanut butter (or even cream cheese) works with jam is the toothsome resistance. Hummus has none. Combined with jam, it feels like baby food in the mouth.

Don't Go Get the Butter

No matter how much Marlon insists, there are alternatives. I'm no health freak, but I can see the day coming when my doc has that discussion with me. It's like a birds-and-bees talk with your dad when you're 13, except you're 55 and your doctor is probably younger than you. And instead of sex and girls, it's about salt and saturated fats.

Here's my suggestion: instead of butter on your toast, use hummus. Instead of a bagel with cream cheese, try tahini. (Yes, even with lox. It's good!) These days, most S.F. cafes stock one or the other, so you can indulge outside the house. At the Hugo St. Cafe (no relation to the Bistro), I often opt for a bagel with hummus and tomato.

"But" -- I can see your inner child pouting already -- "what about jam? What about la confiture? You can't spread those on hummus, yuck! Morning won't be the same! Your suggestion cuts off all possibility of sweet morning comfort!" Ah, perhaps not. I'll address this later.

The only problem: hummus and tahini -- I really like the TJ's tahini, by the way -- won't help on the salt front. Just don't tell your doctor.

June Swoon

A couple years ago fellow Bistrovian BrO turned me on to the marmalade of June Taylor. Best marmalade I've ever had, and better yet I had it all to myself, as The Fanch can't stand the stuff.

Our old friends at Chow have a video interview with June here.